Filling Hearts with Rare, Beautiful Jewels
Early on in my adventure of motherhood, I heard someone compare children’s hearts with a treasure chest. I remember falling in love with that analogy and how it inspired me at the time to begin thinking about all the different ways that I as a mom could be filling my kids’ “treasure chests” with rare and beautiful jewels.
And then, because I am who I am, I went and made it way too complicated and unattainable and then felt defeated and inadequate and gave up with cheesy pie in the sky ideals I couldn’t maintain. whomp whomp…. :)
But a little further into the journey today, I find myself returning again to the imagery of a treasure chest and jewels. Honestly, I really believe that it’s the simplest, everyday moments that hang heaviest with rare, beautiful jewels just waiting to be reached out and gently placed within our children’s hearts, if we remember to give the little moments our attention. My words can be jewels. A hug is a jewel. Time together is bursting with jewels.
I think we all desperately want to cut through the day’s clutter to make lasting impact and connections with our kids. We want to form in them memories of feeling cherished, treasured and loved. And I’m learning lately that, for me, it’s the repetitive rhythms that I build into my life in advance that most help me stay on track with my motherhood goals. And so, I’ve tried to simplify and streamline some things to create a life rhythm that works to help remind me to fill hearts with treasure.
Here are three simple strategies that work for me right now that I thought I’d share:
1) Give them my eyes. I try to remember to stop for just a second every day, pull each kid close, hold their face, look in their eyes, and say “Hey I love you. I think you’re marvelous. I’m so glad you’re in our family. And I have one question? Can I pretty please keep you forever?” Of course they erupt in giggles and the whole thing is only a few seconds long, but I hope these little moments will get into their heart and mind that they are valued and loved and cherished.
2) Pause in the car. I’m often toting kids around at various parts of our week, which means there’s a moment before each car ride when everyone’s buckled and still and in one place. Once I’m in the car, I have a note on my dashboard that says simply “Tell the kids I love you”. It reminds me to pause before we go, turn around in my seat, look at the kids, and tell them I love them. Again, only takes a few seconds, but it helps me to remember to be grateful for these beautiful gifts of children, and I hope it helps them feel loved.
3) Share a few minutes together with a special treat or drink once a week or whenever you can. One of our greatest delights in this house is sharing a few minutes with a mug of hot chocolate, or tea, or decaf coffee while reading a picture book together. It only takes about 10-15 minutes, but it’s turned into this amazing anchor of rest and connection, even in the craziest weeks. We might do it when we get home from school before rushing into dinner preparations, or after lunch if we’re home for lunch. Doesn’t take any prep other than grabbing a few special cups and keeping cocoa/tea/coffee and maybe some treats on hand, and it makes us all feel calm, connected, and present. It’s not perfect, and yes sometimes someone is whining or the baby is screeching, but generally, it’s a really wonderful, peaceful, sacred space in the day.